On Wednesday, February 8, 2012 we were blessed with some news that will be changing our lives forever!
That Thursday my hubby was taking me for a weekend away in Las Vegas to meet up with our families and celebrate my 30th birthday! Well, back to that Wednesday, as a trainer my day starts very early, like 4:30am to meet with clients beginning at 6am. I was a day late (I understand that doesn’t mean anything) but I had a few pregnancy tests laying around (since yes, we were on the ‘trying not to try’ method) and felt that since I’d be in Vegas, it was my 30th birthday and several adult beverages would be consumed, I’d better check, just in case. So I did. I took the test, and followed every direction carefully (cause there are specific rules to follow, to get an accurate read). And yes, I have read the instructions insert several times to make sure I was doing it right. I really wanted a positive read 🙂 So I laid it on the counter and waited the 2-3 minutes to see the results. While I was waiting, I washed my face getting ready for my day. I glanced over at the test, and. . . NOTHING!
I can remember my thoughts and emotions running through my head at that exact moment. We had been on the ‘trying not to try’ method (you know, no bc, tracked my monthly cycle and had lots of sex 🙂 ) for 6 months. I know that’s not very long and people try for years. My husband and I decided that we’d try this method for about a year, before we tried any specific methods to help with conception. We both had concerns of the stress it would add to our lives if it didn’t happen right away. So, as I looked at that negative test, after 2 minutes, I felt a sense of sadness and failure. I had been on bc for over 11 years. I figured when the time came, and I stopped taking it, we’d become pregnant right away! (Silly, I know). I felt sad and frustrated because I’d get my hopes up each month, one month I was even sure I was pregnant, but wasn’t and it was such a let down. The failure stemmed from knowing that as a woman, I am supposed to be able to get pregnant and there was such a fear that my body wasn’t going to let that happen. I continued getting ready, I mean life goes on and there’s always next month. And hey, I could go to Vegas and enjoy those adult beverages knowing that I wasn’t pregnant.
But the story doesn’t end there. About 10 minutes after I took that test, it was still sitting on the sink, I glanced at it one more time. I thought I was seeing things. There was now, two pink lines on the test, but one was SO faint you could barely see it. I opened the bathroom door and woke up my poor husband, who was still trying to get a few minutes of added sleep before he had to get up and go to work, saying, ‘Babe, I need you to come look at this, I think I see something’. At that point I was shaking uncontrollably. He came in and squinted at the test (his eyes hadn’t adjusted to the light yet) and he too, saw two pink lines. At that point he hugged me and I broke down in tears, sobbing. I guess at that point, with my heightened emotions, we should have known it was for real. So many thoughts and feelings running through my head at that point; excitement, joy, that it was unbelievable, fear. . . and pure happiness.
My husband, trying to keep me calm and grounded, just in case it was a false positive said, ‘Well, let’s take another one tomorrow and see if it comes back positive’. I agreed. And after 5 tests over the course of a week, we started to believe it was actually true 🙂
So here’s the beginning of the Family page. It will be used to document my pregnancy journey. Hope you enjoy the roller coaster as much as I am 🙂
Until next time,